on October 14th, 2017 by Rebeccca
There’s a brick wall
thrown up right in my path.
It wasn’t even done nicely.
The mortar between the bricks is ragged.
The bricks are faded.
I throw myself against the wall.
Repeatedly.
Trying to break through
To catch a glimpse of the life we had planned
The future we had dreamed
Trying to find him.
He’s everywhere around me
But he’s not here.
I know he’s gone.
I watched him go.
For two months.
It’s this stupid wall that is keeping us apart.
Maybe if I can find a door.
I can just open it and walk through
And find my way back to the path.
Our path.
I know
In my head
That when I find the path
He won’t be there
And it will be just me.
And I know
In my head
That I will create a life
That is joyful and full.
But for now
All I can see is that damn wall.
| Posted in
Grieving
13 Responses to “The Brick Wall”
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October 14th, 2017 at 1:47 pm
Becky. I feel your pain and loneliness and life goes on. Evenpreanticipatory grief doesn’t always prepare us for the huge hole that has been created. Take your time on decisions , connect with long lost acquaintances, look after yourself, tomorrow is another day, then weeks, months and you’ll look back on this time and think how did I get through all of this. Take care. Galen was one of a kind person!!
October 14th, 2017 at 2:24 pm
That is so beautiful Rebecca. There is so much to feel and express. I think of you each day and wonder……I wish we could be together. Many hugs
October 14th, 2017 at 2:56 pm
So beautifully written, Rebecca, it brought tears. Such a difficult time for you, but I know you are strong. Love and hugs.
October 14th, 2017 at 3:06 pm
I ache for you, Rebecca. What a heartfelt poem, so beautifully written.
October 14th, 2017 at 4:23 pm
Ahhh Becky so well said, I think of Galen everyday so can’t imagine what you are going through.
My heart is aching for you right now but I know that you will rise above this only remembering all the good times you had with Galen. Take care of yourself love and hugs.
October 14th, 2017 at 5:34 pm
Oh Becky, I wish I could do something. May your memories give comfort and not sadness.
October 14th, 2017 at 5:53 pm
I’m am saddened by your heartache!
October 14th, 2017 at 6:15 pm
very beautiful and well said. I am trying to find the door to see mom again but like you I cannot find it.
October 14th, 2017 at 6:27 pm
For Peter
I died but did not leave you.
I am here, I have not gone.
Though my spirit left my body
Don’t be sad, for I live on.
My love is all around you.
Can you feel it? Can you see?
That offshore breeze upon your face is not the wind
Its me.
I’m the song of a robin when spring is in the air.
I’m the sunflowers in a garden
You can find me everywhere.
Whenever you are missing me look up to into the skies.
I’m the shining of the stars,
The sunset the sunrise.
I’m a raindrop and a rainbow. I’m the ocean’s waves of blue;
So everywhere you go you’ll know,
I live on,
Loving you.
October 15th, 2017 at 7:48 am
Comments…..
October 15th, 2017 at 7:50 am
Think of you often. Sometimes life is not fair! Take care.
October 15th, 2017 at 2:15 pm
This reminds me of a line from Edna St Vincent Malee “life goes on. I forget just why. It does go in and we have to go with it. I am so sorry for you I pray you will find peace again.
October 21st, 2017 at 2:26 pm
I wish I had some words of comfort or wisdom, but all I can say is that we think of you every day and feel the echo of your pain. You are an amazing person and I’m sure your words will help others who are grieving.